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december 21.

december21_2015

Today’s prompt:

Meditate.  Take 10 minutes to sit in stillness. Breathe. Let go of all holiday expectations.

Things always become clearer when I stop and think.

I reacted strongly to my children silly singing a Christmas song.  I felt offended and I didn’t quite know why.  My irritation was visceral. It felt like they were mocking something sacred.  I had to leave the area and sit in stillness.

It quickly dawned on me that the sound of Christmas songs, not holiday songs, are strongly connected to a memory of my grandmother and my childhood.

Christmas songs grounded me as a child.  The one line from O Holy Night, “Fall on your knees / Oh hear the angels voices,” resonates deeply. I can’t pinpoint an exact memory of why or when.  All I know is that a lump in my throat appears and my heart twinges in longing.  I long to hear her voice again.  To hear her pray.  To have her stand beside me in church while I hold the song missal and sing for the both of us.

It is in stillness that I listen.  It is in the darkest and longest night of the year that I am able to feel warmth through the light of memory and the glint of grace found in a few words of a song.

 

 

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