49.

For the last three days I have felt like a hummingbird.

I have expended all energy flitting from one room to the next taking everything out, categorizing, and discarding.  We have made countless trips dropping off unwanted items at the donation centre.

Although I had my hopes set on finishing discarding by today, it’s not going to happen.  My husband has been busy prepping for the demolition of our room and hasn’t had time to really go through his things yet.  There are piles.  We’ve done a ton but the discarding process will continue this week.

I was reminded of Henry Miller’s essay entitled, “Stand Still like the Hummingbird.”

He writes that ““either you take in believing in miracles or you stand still like the hummingbird” and that “the greatest miracle is the discovery that all is miraculous.”

As I have touched every object, deliberating whether to keep or discard, I have been overwhelmed with gratitude.  I have been in awe of the story of our lives and the countless miracles that led us right here.  Looking back, there were miracles that were disguised as major disappointments, losses, and failures – lost bids on homes, failing to get into schools, and even a death in the family.  Without these experiences, we would not be in this home.

I have come to understand, through this tidying process, that our home is a miracle.

This home where I have spent the last three days getting to know again and loving it as the eighth member of our family.

The tidying continues and surprisingly, my energy hasn’t waned.  Before the flitting and flying around discarding, I find stillness in the morning.  Scribbles have been relegated to late at night in order to have enough time to take a moment to breathe and to re-read passages from Marie Kondo’s book to remind me of what I need to do and to be grateful throughout this process.

We cleared the living room just so we could have a resting space while we still tackled the piles.

A quick update.  Here is what our living room looks like right now:

And here is the work in progress still in the dining room and the basement:

Henry Miller also writes, “and the nature of the miraculous is – utter simplicity.”

Living simply, asking ourselves what is serving us here and now without clinging to a past that can’t be changed or in complete anticipation of a future that doesn’t exist, is living miraculously.

Now the big question is:  How does it work when there are children and spouses to consider?  I can live simply but can we all do it together?

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100 scribbles…hurriedly writing the here and now.

#100scribbles