an apology + an update.

heart on a tree

We are back in Toronto after two months abroad and I owe you an apology.

In the previous post that I wrote about a month ago, I promised to post sooner.

It has now been a full moon’s cycle.

I apologize for the absence, the cliff hanging, and the neglect.

Costa Rica, specifically the Caribe Sur, gently, and sometimes not so gently, nudged me into the present moment.  Every encounter was full of magic and surprise.  After I threw expectation out the window, each moment guided me to the next. (I also spent a lot of time making these large leaves into hearts and leaving them in the jungle for people to find.)

And at no point in time did the place tell me to sit at this laptop.

Wifi was spotty in the house we rented and I didn’t want to spend my days blogging in a cafe while life was happening in front of me.  I didn’t want to be an observer.  I became an active participant.  I was guided to  life-changing events and to meet extraordinary souls along the way.  And none of that would have happened if I was on this laptop at a cafe documenting and not living.

Now that we are in Toronto again, I am in full reflection mode.  We are in familiar surroundings and my senses are taking a break from being bombarded day and night. As I adjust to cooler temperatures, my body is saying it is time to stop, to keep warm, and to be still.  I interpret this as making myself a hot cup of coffee, curling in a blanket and reading through my journal and writing down anything that comes in moments of clarity. It is time to disseminate and absorb.  It is time to play back the stimulating sensory reel of the last two months while staying right here.  To reflect without attachment but only with fondness and an understanding of how I arrived here.  Back home.

I love how everything has its time and place.

This week I began a journey held by Sacred Female Space.  The timing of everything is uncanny.  Spring equinox ushered in a transitional phase, a space between here and there, and a planting of seeds abroad and at home.  This particular journey begins at a simultaneous place of departure and at a place of arrival.  The planting of seeds abroad came with visions and dreams that I am piecing together here at home. I hope to share more information about what I learn with my community of women here.  I will have more info on how that will happen soon.

As I begin this spring season of new beginnings and new intentions, a time to step back and look at the broader picture, I want to share my experiences with you.  I want to release all that I have learned in the last couple of months right here in a huge exhale.  I want to tell our family stories of living in the jungle for the last two months.  I want to tell you about my own story of finding things I didn’t know I was looking for.  I want to tell you how this trip became a rite of passage for me as a mother about to launch my first born.  I want to tell you about all the moments we danced in the rain and sang songs of thanks as we skipped through our jungle playground.I want to tell stories of trust, wisdom, and intuition.  I want to tell you how I encountered magic and learned to practice it.   I want to talk about the power of words and the miracle of feelings.  I want to tell you about the ocean’s whisperings and the earth’s sighs.   I want to tell you about hellos, goodbyes, and see you soons.

Tomorrow I begin with the story of what happened when my husband left us in our little Costa Rican caribbean town for 10 days…







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