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Vignette 34/52. Consistency.

Warning: This blog post may put you to sleep.

I am in love with this word.

A friend said that she read somewhere that the source of happiness is consistency.

YES. YES. YES.

Consistency is an endangered species at this time. And of course, we like to zag when everyone zigs so Chris and I have become the king and queen of the kingdom of Consistency.

The same dear friend who is also a guide at our learning center said that she had never been a part of a project that put relationships first until she joined this project. For me, I remain consistent with this belief especially at this time.

I have not missed a day of work this year. In fact, other than travel days, I have not missed a day of work in two years. Maintaining relationships is important to me because continuity strengthens the connection.

I can only hold this consistency in this realm of my life because of the consistency that exists in everything else that I do.

My routines are the same. I rise before first light at 4:00am and I go to bed shortly after 8:00pm. I have morning coffee with Chris while we do our morning pages, meditate, write, plan, train, and then we walk the dogs. Before bed we listen to a podcast together, most likely one on sports, and then I fall asleep before he does and he takes the air pod out of my ear.

I train 6 days a week – 4 days with kettlebells and 2 days of hills.

When I am not in the middle of a 10 Day fast, I fast two days a week: Tuesdays and Fridays.

I teach from 9:00-2:00pm and then I take the kids to their programs after while I sit and catch up on internet or have meetings.

At this moment in my life, I limit social outings. Any free time is spent at the beach relaxing or at home reading everything other than books on education.

Consistency also shows up in the way I parent. Every night, during dinner, the kids talk profusely about their days and experiences. We talk about our words and actions that day, how we feel about them, and how they may have done better. They always share an act of kindness they were able to perform. I give honest feedback to them and hold them accountable for mistakes and also give them chances to try again. I share my own failures and frustrations and they also give me chances to try again.

I am consistent with my marriage. Chris and I talk in the mornings and we are silent with each other at bed time. After 26 years, we both have found that this is the healthiest routine for our marriage. There are a lot less arguments and we sleep better.

Being consistent is harder than it seems. We tell ourselves FOMO stories or that this type of life is boring. Remaining steadfast with equanimity regardless of what is happening around me has been one of the most challenging things of my life as I adapt to changing laws, anxious children, emotional families, and guides that need to be supported as they walk this road of consistency beside me.

Chris has run a beach volleyball program for the last four years and a strength club for young men and women for a year and a half.

We show up. We show up even when we are tired and even when there are things in our life that rock our world. When people ask me how I do it, it’s hard to explain how consistency is like a soothing balm. It is our saving grace when others need to retreat. When we face difficulty, we do the opposite.

We show up to our routine and we heal in the evenness and ease of it all.

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